To the person who stole all the Quince fruit off my tree two years in a row:
It was bad enough you stole all the fruit while I watched my mother dying. Now, once again, you have stolen all the fruit off of my tree this year as well. I was rather looking forward to preparing a lovely compote from the fruit. I am sorry you don't feel like paying $2 per fruit at the market for this delicacy. May Karma bite you in the ass and bite you hard for this evil deed of yours.
Next year, I will be ready for you. You shall reap the wrath of the warriors whose blood courses through my veins...