Thursday, December 20, 2007

Tacky Christmas Decorations

Okay, enough of the tacky Christmas decorations, folks! Seriously!

Let me start off by ranting about the stuff people put on their cars. Those Christmas wreaths people put on the front of their cars? What is that supposed to mean? I was raised in a culture where wreaths symbolized death. They are used for the dead at funerals. I know that people use wreaths at Christmas time, I have gotten used to this. However, on a car, it just looks like a coroner-mobile (no offense intended for my coroner friends) or something that belongs in a funeral procession. It also looks like a green bull's eye target. To me, it looks like a message saying, "Hit my car here."

Oh, and the doofus that puts reindeer antlers on the top of a car? What is that all about? Is it supposed to be cute? I just about slid into the car in front of me gawking at its hideousness. Not only is it tacky, but it is driving hazard! Somehow, putting artificial animal parts on cars just does not seem right to me.

Now, let me rant about the decorations people put in the front of their houses. When people cover just about every square inch of their lawn in random Christmas decorations, it just looks like a rummage sale explosion. The only thing missing is a sign that says "Christmas decorations for sale, make offer". I have seen some places decorated to the hilt, but usually it centers around some theme, or is sectioned off into the various themes. As a result, even though it is in excess, it actually is enjoyable to look at. Otherwise, it is an eye sore waiting for trash pick up day.

Now, for some of the inflatable Christmas decorations. Some of them move, some of them make noise. Some of them do both. Some of them get knocked down in high winds and look like trauma victims. The giant inflatable Grinch? Please. If I was a kid, I would probably have nightmares after seeing that thing. I don't think the idea of this holiday is to try to scare little children. Since when does a giant inflatable Grinch convey "peace on Earth and goodwill towards men?" The thing that is mostly weird about the inflatable Christmas decorations is that people inflate them at night, but deflate them during the day. This looks just plain weird in daylight. Sort of like deflated corpses strewn about on a lawn.

It used to be when I was a child, I would love walking up and down the streets at night with my mom looking at the Christmas decorations. Pretty lights, a lovely nativity scene here or there, maybe a Santa, Frosty the Snowman, etc. I always wanted to go for car rides with my parents this time of year to see the decorations that were too far from the neighborhood.

Now, I have no desire look at the decorations out on the lawns. Not any more.

Seriously, what has happened?


Blogger Miz Minka said...

Oh, that was too funny! I am so with you on this rant. Well, I don't know about the wreaths, because I don't associate them with death. But the other things:

You think reindeer antlers are tacky? What about the shiny chrome testicles some pea-brained guys (with probably very small you-know-whats) put on their big pick-up trucks? OMG! Every time I see one of those I think: There goes another fine example of the shallow end of the gene pool.

Most decorated yards at this time of year are eye-sores. Especially the ones with those inflatable abominations. Whenever I see one of these grotesque blow-ups, I have to suppress the urge to seize a sharp object and poke holes in them.

It seems that tackiness rules these days. I fight it by not participating. :)

Monday, December 31, 2007 10:47:00 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

Miz Minka,

Glad to see someone is on my side! I am still fighting the urge not seize a sharp object and go after those inflatable decorations.

I did not put up any decorations either. Parly because of my mood, partly because I was so disgusted this year about all the tackiness around me.

Yes, those chrome testicles should be castrated...

Wednesday, January 02, 2008 11:06:00 AM  

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